Slip N Slide

My parents were geniuses. They didn’t believe in buying crappy toys that would bust two seconds after being purchased.

Case in point, Slip ‘N Slide. If you’ve ever slid on one, you know how thin and cheap they are. Instead of paying whatever amount for a slip n slide, my parents had an awesome idea of using some construction plastic that we had lying around to use in lieu of the name brand product.

As luck would have it, we lived on a pretty awesome hill that not only was good for sledding on snow in the winter, but also, for our new summer experiment, a DIY slip n’ slide.

It was about a million times better than the toy found at stores. You see the construction plastic was probably 20 feet wide and 40 feet long, ~8 Mil thick, taking up most of our front yard. We got it all set up with the garden hose at the top, and we were slippin’ and slidin’ and having all sorts of fun. We even got some dish soap to make it slickery’er than snot! I would have killed at the time for some non-chloric, silicon based kitchen lubricant from Clark Griswold to make us go sailing even faster. Even the cool kids who never would have been seen dead with us decided it was worth the cost of moving down a few rungs on the social ladder and joined in.

This went on for a day or three until ….

On my last run, I got revved up to launch myself down this mountain of mayhem. The air blistering through my hair, I made it about halfway down the run, having the time of my life, until the most unfortunate thing happened. You see my backside found one of the sprinkler heads as I was going about 90mph down the hill. Well let me tell you, that was not something I was expecting, and I whelped in pain. The rest of the ride wasn’t so fun as I twisted and contorted in excruciating agony. It hurt for days upon days afterwards. I think I broke my Coccyx (like Grandma in the sand dunes). Needless to say, I didn’t want to do slip n’ slide anymore.